Facing Changes

Wow, I had planned on keeping my blog updated at least weekly. Have I let things slip! Much has happened in the past couple of weeks; it seems like change is coming at me from every direction. I’m trying to figure out how well I react to change. It’s easy for me to see how it affects my kids as I watch them go through it.

My oldest in particular has hated change from the time he was very little. Unfortunately, he’s had to face that challenge over and over and over growing up as a Missionary Kid. No matter the situation – new school (almost too many to count), new country, new town, new soccer team, anything new - he’s had to be pushed out the door and usually we question if it’s worth the fight. Ironically, he usually adjusts quicker than the rest of us to the new location and we have to ask him afterwards, “why the fuss?” One of the most vivid examples of this was when we told J we were moving back to the states. He stormed off angrily. The next day he came to us and said “fine, we can move back to the states, just promise me we won’t have to come back here”. The fuss was not at all about Hungary or America, it was completely about change.

I have to admit, I’ve always prided myself in being a very adaptable person. I love new places, enjoy meeting people and adventure screams out to me. Any personality assessment places me high in the pioneer category. One thing I think God has been teaching me, though, is that I like to be in control of the changes. Unfortunately, I’m a slow learner, so He has shown me quite a bit lately that I’ve got to let go. Really, I imagine He laughs at me when I say that, as if I actually had any control of my circumstances! The one place I find myself coming back to over and over is on my knees in front of Him, arms out stretched, giving Him back what I had no business trying to control. I’m so glad He’s a patient Father!

The past couple of weeks I’ve been trying to keep up with the changes going on around me. My kids can’t possibly be that old! I have a junior in high school? Now we are beginning to look at colleges – that just can’t be true! And then I’ve had a huge change of jobs and we’ve become business owners. I’m excited, and scared. I’ve questioned if I can do this, if it’s a good time to step out, and yet, I really love owning and managing Krave Juice. On top of all of this, I’ve been given an opportunity to plug into our small groups ministry at church by helping write for the School of Leaders. I’ve really been praying for something like this to come along. I could go on and on as the past couple of weeks have been loaded with change. Most of the change has been good, but I’m afraid I’ve fussed a bit at God. Change can be painful and almost always gets us out of our comfort zone. The key for me is how long I’ll try to grab control of the situation before I realize God’s plan is perfect and I can trust Him to have the best in mind for me.